Ilfracombe - "See the sea from every tee"

Preview

"Located in an Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty, Ilfracombe Golf Club boasts one of the most spectacular locations in South West for an exhilarating round of golf." (It says on the website.)

If you want to find out more about the course you'll need to watch the flyover videos. Peter Alliss does the voiceover. He tells me there are six par threes and I reckon this could be a beast if the wind's blowing.

What actually happened

The wind blew alright. And it was a beast. And it poured down.

Before I get onto that though I need to talk about this 'see the sea from every tee' business. Now I know it was chucking it down but we did wonder whether you might have needed a ladder to see it from 11 and 12. If we go back it's one to check out.

On a nice day this might have been viewed as a very interesting challenge. Lots of up and down holes, short holes (a 68 yard par three!), long holes, elevated tees, elevated greens. It could have been great.

Without the wind, which was blowing a hoolie. And the rain which lashed down later on. It was a miracle all of us completed the full 18. Scores were naturally affected but to the point that an 'Exceptional Circumstances' rule was enforced and fewer people had their handicaps raised than would have on a normal day. We won't forget this one in a hurry.

Best scores:

27 points - Ben W (off 8) 2017
27 points - Ben F (off 17) 2017
27 points - Stuart (off 36) 2017

It also ended up being the first course to have a poem written about it...

The Avengers? Overrated.

The Famous Five? Fine.

If you want real heroes try the Ilfracombe Nine.

Nine teed off, nine finished eighteen

But what happened in between?

The forecast was grim, there were no ifs

It would be rough on the Ilfracombe cliffs.

The bloke in the Pro Shop, he had no doubt

‘Sure, take a buggy - but the glass might blow out’.

The wind was howling as we stood on the first

We all suspected it would get worse.

It did.

The rain started gently, like the hotel shower

(cold, and no power)

Then someone turned on the taps

The rain found the gaps down the neck, through the hat

(Water’s like that)

Soon it seeped through the shoes

Then the trousers (bad news!)

The scorecards were like a damp rag

As was the stuff in your golf bag

The people in glasses struggled to see

I should know, one of them was me.

But no one gave up, no one walked off

Which poses the question, are we daft or tough?

(We’d have given up on another day but the clubhouse was too far away.)

The scores were much lower but it hardly mattered

The Ilfracombe Nine were totally shattered

It was much later when our very own Vorders

Read out the scores in no particular order.

An exceptional day, it was so strange

That for future Tours the rules will be changed

Fighting the course, getting throughly wet

This is one round we’ll never forget.

So fill up your glass, your choice, beer or wine

And let’s raise a toast to the Ilfracombe Nine.